Where’s a wig when you need one?

I can’t stand finding dog hair on the carpet. But of course, when Mike adopted his parents’ two adorable Welsh Corgies, I knew that I would have to deal with it. These dogs shed all year long. I’d have to vaccuum 3 times a day if I wanted the carpets to look clean. I complain when Mike lets the dogs jump on our bed because I find it disgusting to sleep or make love without an interupting dog hair getting stuck on my tongue or in my eye. The irony of all this is that now a few months after I have given birth to my son, my hair is falling out. I am shedding at the rate of or worse than my two Corgies.

After I put my hair up in a ponytail (my typical easy mommy hairdo) and run my hands down my tail to straighten it out, I have about 5 or 6 hairs left on my hand. Mike says that he’ll feel a tickle and think he has a bug on his back or neck and go to swat it, but only find one of my “crooky” hairs there instead. When I take a shower and run my fingers through my hair, my fingers look like a dense spider web of black hair. I have to pull it out between my fingers and stick it to the wall so it doesn’t clog our pipes, but I still can’t catch the few stragglers that have slid down my soaped back and found their way to the drain. But thats not all. After I grab the hair off the wall and throw it in the trash I proceed with my after shower ritual—standard teeth brushing, body lotion, deodorant, and hair brushing. As I rub lotion on my legs, I have to stop here and there to pull of a hair that went sliding down my back but didn’t make it to the drain and instead set up camp on the back of my thigh or around my ankle. And when I brush my hair, I am constantly having to clean my brush because of the hair build up on the bristles. This is not funny…..its scary. What is happening to me? Well of course, those who know me know that I will not just shrug my shoulders and move on. I do my research. And low and behold….I find that the 9 months of pregnancy that led to me growing a thick, gorgeous head of dark waves was because my hormones stopped my hair from falling out those months. The typical person loses about a hundred hairs a day. Multiply a hundred by 30 and we have 3, 000 hairs. Multiply that by 9 months and we have 27, 000 hairs that stayed rooted to my scalp. Well, after a couple of months post partum while the body is reorganizing it’s hormones, the hormone that took a vacation emerges and has to play catchup. All 27, 000 hairs that didn’t fall out for 9 months are now falling out at a rate that is probably more like 500 hairs a day. I feel like Christine Taylor on the teen film The Craft after one of the witches casts a spell on her for her hair to fall out. I actually had to apologize ahead of time to our maid so that when she swept the floor or vacuumed the carpet and found tons of long brown hairs amongst the short dog fur, she didn’t think I was ill.

Well, now that I know, I give fair warning to my mommy-to-be friends out there. Enjoy your thick hair during pregnancy because it will be gone when your done.

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One thought on “Where’s a wig when you need one?

  1. Funny!!!! That is true – I lost so so much hair after having Noah, up until the 5th month and now its growing back and I have these little new growth patchs and that is bad too…… I can only say it does come back, but don’t think its coming back anytime soon….. Missing you……

    Love,
    Jennifer

    Like

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