1. I talk out loud to myself all the time. Even when alone. Yep! I just don’t answer myself. That would make me crazy, I think. This is one good reason for bringing my kids to the grocery story with me. So I can tell myself out loud that I just need to find the coffee filters and the garlic salt before leaving and have no strangers around me wonder if I’m speaking to them. J
2. I pray out loud to God.It keeps me focused on my prayer and not allow the prayer to drift off into thought.
3. I mispronounce words all the time.Typically, they are new words I don’t know, so I’m not sure how to pronounce it if it is not phonetically clear. But sometimes it’s common words when I’m speaking, even when I know the correct pronunciation. It just comes out wrong! My husband laughs at me and wonders how I became an English teacher. Ask him how I pronounce Shasta. J Maybe I have a hearing problem? These top three reasons along with the fact that I cannot tell the difference between my husband’s “yeahs” and “nos” and have certain friends I just can’t understand over the phone makes me wonder….hmmmm.
4. I am crooked. I have a crooked toe, a crooked smile, crooked eyes and eye brows, a crooked back, and even a crooked tongue. Hence the nickname—Crookyt –which I have used as a social media title for many years. I suppose I don’t embrace the crookedness of my facial features thought. Its why I wear my hair to one side and side bangs….to cover up the squished up side of my face!
5. I have a song for each of my kids that I made up when they were babies.

Kanan—My name is Kanan, I like my milk on tap. Don’t give me no bottle I don’t drink that crap. Choo-Choo trains and race cars are what I like to play. But if you give me bottle I will say no way!

Jameson—who’s that baby with the dark blue eyes, chubby cheeks and chunky thighs? His name is JJ and he likes to stand. Sucks every finger on his right hand. Cute bottom lip, itty bitty toes, fuzzy little head and a button nose!

Benjamin—My name is Benjamin and I like Piñatas. My Momma, she makes um really good enchiladas. I like to poop and I like to play. But when it comes to talking, I will have it my way. Like Burger King, I am delish, just ask my Momma, you will get your wish!

Scotland—Scotty Scotty Scotland, lives on Maryland, has three brothers who do what she tells them too. She’s a little cutie pie. She’s a little sweetie pie. But take her Momma and she will surely surely cry!

And…(yep, she has two)

             My name is Scotland, I’m really pretty. My Mommy loves me in a Foofy Diddy. Or without one. It doesn’t                        matter. Cuz I’m sweet and special in every way….

6. I talk with a strange voice to be silly with my kids.I do it by moving my tongue in such a way as to block the back of my throat. Then I push the air up from my mouth back up my nose as I speak. It sounds like a duck kind of.
7. I speak for all my babies before they can speak for themselves.They all have a voice similar to Cartman from South Park and are extremely bossy.
8. I’m a storyteller. When telling stories with my sister, I can go off into strange hypothetical scenarios that make us laugh so hard, we cry.
9. Red grapes give me fun, exciting butterflies in my stomach. I often eat them around 1 o’clock in the afternoon for a pick-me-up. It helps me endure my 5th period class, who can drive me bonkers sometimes.
10. I have a Wild Imagination.

    I often imagine ways to break taboos. For example, I’ll be teaching my class one moment and then realize….I could jump on top of that table right now and do the running man. I could. I won’t but I could.