Scotland had her 2 week checkup today and passed with flying colors. She weighs 8 lbs, 5 oz now which means she not only met her birth weight, but exceeds it by a full pound and a couple of ounces. Even though she has a tongue tie like her brothers, she is nursing so well. When I was sitting there in the pediatrician’s office, hearing all of this good news I couldn’t help but think about all the other ways God has blessed this 4th pregnancy, the birth, and the baby.
Owen and I decided last year to get a Vasectomy because after 3 c-sections, each progressively harder on my body, we thought it would be the wise thing to do to protect my body from further damage. My recovery from the C-section after Benjamin’s birth was hard. And my wound wouldn’t heal. It kept opening up in the center so my doctor had to have me keep coming back for silver applications.
Then I learned about all of the risks that go significantly up for 4th c-sections. Scary stuff that can happen and much more likely on the 4th than any first three. Blood transfusions, uterine ruptures, bladder ruptures, intestinal damage, etc.
So I accepted that I would be a mother of three boys. And that would be it.
There was added relief as well I admit when we got the vasectomy. As much as I wanted a daughter one day, it was nice to know I wouldn’t have to suffer through the hemorrhoids from pregnancy weight and acid reflux that kept me up all night. I wouldn’t have to suffer through the weird effect of the spinal block I get when it spreads to my lungs and I feel like I can’t breathe on the operating table, squirming until the anesthesiologist puts an oxygen mask on my face to pull me out of the anxiety attack. Then of course our terrible luck with having NICU babies. Kanan was in NICU for 4 days. He had water in his lungs, a blood infection due to my water being broken for more than 24 hours, and a super high heart rate (side effect of the infection and my fever as well). Jameson never went to NICU, but because he was so big, they took him from me an extra hour to make sure he passed a glucose test. Then his high palate, severe tongue tie, and underbite made his latch so poor, even though he was in my room the entire time at the hospital, he had a real hard time nursing and lost too much weight so I had nurses pestering me and worrying me about his “thriving.” Then Benjamin didn’t cry when he was born. And he too was big so he had to take the glucose test, only to fail. So between those two things, they took him to the NICU as well. He was there for 2 days. Then with all three boys, I suffered from major postpartum anxiety. I had anxiety attacks with each one within the first couple of weeks after they were born and had a few more during the first year after they were born.
So I was thankful I wouldn’t have to experience any of that again.
And then I got pregnant. It was a 1 in 10,000 chance I heard. Owen’s sperm count 6 months post-vasectomy was actually higher than when he initially got the vasectomy. Most likely cause– the tubes actually regrew back together. The Doctor said this was very very rare.
I think this was God’s way of saying “vasectomy shmamectomy. You can’t stop my will.”
Fears of all of the above would build up in my mind after I learned of my pregnancy. But I couldn’t help but be reminded that if God could bypass a vasectomy to bring me my fourth child, he could surely get me through a 4th c-section.
And he did. He went over and beyond.
- First off, we learned we were having a girl at the ultrasound. Finally. Our daughter.
- My pregnancy was easier. No hemorrhoids. No acid reflux. Minimal weight gain (24 lbs).
- The surgery went smoothly. Even the anesthesia didn’t affect my breathing. I was calm the entire time. No difficulty breathing. I did lose enough blood to give me some platelet issues afterward and some anemia, but it was manageable.
- The baby was healthy. She is my smallest baby. A healthy 7 lbs, 2 oz. And it paid off. She didn’t need a glucose test. She passed her Apgar test. And they even brought her to me in the recovery room to nurse, something I never experienced with my boys because they were all taken from me.
- She stayed with me the entire time in my room. She nursed well. And while she was diagnosed with COOMS (a weird condition when the baby has a blood type that doesn’t like the mothers’ blood type, which makes them at a higher risk for Jaundice) she never developed jaundice.
- Finally, It has been 2 1/2 weeks since she has been born and only felt some anxiety one time while I was driving a couple of days ago. I had a fearful thought which lead my body to start going into anxiety attack mode, but I felt it developing, prayed, did some deep breathing, changed my thoughts and within a few minutes it was gone. That was it. By now with the boys, I would have had a few full fledged attacks.
God is so good. He laughed at our human attempt to stop him from blessing us with a girl. He blessed us anyway. And he protected me from all the fears that lead us to deciding on the vasectomy the first time.
Our last fear is how we will afford this 4th child. But something tells me, God will take care of that too.